I feel like (you're slipping away,&)
we are dangling on a thin thread.
I'm over you. I'm over you
But your presence makes me think.
Makes me remember.
Of the times I cherish with you.
Your effort, your shyness, you. &I
Wonder.
Was it me? Somehow, was it me?
Am I not enough anymore?
For your attention. Your thoughts.
Do I cross your mind? Your heart? &I
Wonder.
Is there a future for us? At all?
Why couldn't I pull away sooner?
Why can't I pull away now?
You frustrate me.
I don't think you realize,
how deeply I'm caught.
You were my first, serious investment.
Investment in love.
Deposited my feelings but
lost the savings.
Why can't I just move on? Why
are you still so close in my heart?
This hurts. It sucks.
I cry cry cry sometimes,
because I still have hope.
That somehow, just maybe,
this vicious cycle would eventually
bring us back together.
You don't want us.
No holding hands
No affection hugs
No nothing
even though it used to be normal.
I don't want false hope. &I
know it is me, making it harder.
It's just difficult. To erase.
And easier to believe
that you would realize
what you had was all of me. &That
would be enough.
